its good ol' cranky me.
becoming the 2-faced freak again.
why is there a need for me to carry on this public and private persona thingy?
kinda feels like the mad woman in that Fann Wong show.

in a crowd, i'm easy to spot.
NAH. i'm not the crowd stealer (according to most, i'm not pretty enough for that)
usually the loudest and the most irritating sound would belong to MOI.
i'm just not COOL.
i dunno- never ever been in the POPULAR/PRETTY clique or shit.
but i am the CLOWN, the JOKE.
People love my jokes. i'm the RAH RAH one, the CRAZY woman, the one ppl poke fun of and laff at.
Dun get me wrong. i am not complaining - my jokes are hella good.
i'm just in such a mood, everything seems like a bad thing.


I try to be the nicest person I can to everyone (even though it feels as plastic as PLASTIC). but i just know i have to do that to survive.
I'm sure that this is a mutual thing la (too bad lor).


then i go back to being myself when i'm alone.
the one that thinks too much.
the quiet one.
the one that really needs all the TLC she can get.
the attention seeker - attention in other forms.
the one that feels lonely all the time.

I don;t know what wrong with me.
or i'm being too cranky.
i just want to be taken seriously.
i want to be wanted.

i want to be me.